I needed to find A Quiet Space in the Chaos. It's been a tough week. 10 days ago, the 15th March I was sat binge watching TV, without a care in the world. A Whatsapp came through telling me that visas at the UAE border would be suspended on 17th March. My two children George and James were in Switzerland and UK in school. The unfolding events on the news that I had been vaguely following, in that second, became very real. Scrabbling for flights, on hold with airlines and rushed emails to teachers. My disgruntled kids who believed I was, at best over reacting and at worst, losing the plot.
In the whirlwind that followed, I stocked the freezer, bought sanitiser and gloves, quarantined the boys (one with a sore throat!!). I sorted out online learning, I tried to keep my husband from "just nipping out", and I checked on parents in UK while patiently explaining why my dad really shouldn't be still playing bowls. Like many of you out there, I'm exhausted, stressed out and rather frightened at the world which seems to have, overnight, become a very unfamiliar place.
To be honest, I would never have considered myself a worrier, beyond Does my bum look good in this? And should I have that next gin and tonic? But it seems for the record, I am actually an olympic worrier after all. I have played out scenarios in my head that make me have to physically stop and distract myself.
So Day 10 of lockdown. I feel like the Fun Police , spelling out yet again to my kids why no they can't just go visit a friend, even if they stay 2 meters away. And no I'd rather you didn't go for a run, can you run around the garden?
I have however always been quite spiritual, and I meditate most mornings. This is now my salvation and the only thing that calms me down, when I feel that tight knot in my stomach starting to rise to my throat like its choking me. But I'm not going to write about meditating, but rather a little project that occupied me today. I made a little Quiet Space in the Chaos for me to retreat to when I need it.
In a corner of my bedroom, I dragged the little fold up mattress that my daughter uses when her friend has a sleepover. I covered it with my favourite cream comforter, layered it with an IKEA sheepskin and some cushions. While I was aware of the stares of my family as I rummaged through the Christmas decorations cupboard, I found some twinkly lights and candles. And added my favourite chunky knit throw.
I made a quiet corner. It took me an hour. An hour I didn't spend worrying about if I just heard my husband cough, or if my daughter has washed her hands. I made a corner to meditate in, to sit and read in, and to write our blog in. Amongst all of the chaos I built a den, and it feels really good.
If you need to Find a Quiet Space in the Chaos, or you have done already get in touch.
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